Laryngitis and a trip to the store

Hearing me speak right now brings to mind a 6 pack a day smoker or stoma patient. Whispering for my dogs to "SHUT UP" because they are barking at 6:50 in the morning. I know dogs have great hearing mine can hear a squirrel fart at 50 yards and run barking after them. Can they hear me? no. Yesterday, as I was feeling about ready to drop I had to go to the store. Of course that is when I run into a "girl" I knew in high school. She stopped to say hello and then upon hearing my voice and seeing my dark circles for eyes she shuddered in her step and kept right on walking leaving me talking to her back. (I had just brushed my teeth and had not had garlic or poppy seed bagels in days) Why did I not just nod imperiously and walk on myself?
I think I know why. It was novel to sound like froggy from "Our Gang" but now the novelty has worn off and I am ready to sound like myself again. Phone calls are impossible and when my friends stop laughing they tell me that it is hard to hear me and that I should rest my voice. Which translated means "That rasping noise coming from your mouth is making the hair in my ears hurt. Stop talking"
So I guess blogging is the way to go. Aren't you lucky, I could have called but instead I caught you up with a blog. I just figured out why the dogs haven't been coming when I call. My voice is on a frequency that even they cant hear.

Dear Santa

Dearest Santa,

I realize it has been a while since we have spoken and I really am the one to blame for that. There are a few things this year though that I think you should know I would like I just wish more of them were found in stores. That is why I thought it would be wise to just talk to you and then maybe you could discuss things with your boss (God, cause I know that you two are close.) So dear Santa these are the things I would like for Christmas.
1. I really would like a Red Ryder BB Gun or a major award Lamp Leg I am not picky.
2. I would like a bike, actually my old bike in working condition with a big bow on near the tree....It wont matter that I can't ride it until spring.
3. I would like new flooring in my bathrooms and kitchen and the cupboards finished (you have elves could I borrow them I could feed them and send them back they might like a little change of venue)
4. Could you help me find the perfect gift for My husband you have seen his wish list I know you two talk please just a hint.....(please) perhaps I should have put this at the top of the list.
5. A puppy in a big box that I could enjoy and then give back.
6. The keys to a new car that is sitting in the driveway for me in a little box with a big bow.(red please)
7.The chance to go a couple of more Christmas's with the kids still feeling the wonder of Christmas morning.
8. Two Zu Zu pets. (well yes I would share them with the kids but hey I think they are cute too)
9. the perfect gifts for my two children.(again I know that you have seen their lists.)
10. There are several people this year Santa who I know are suffering and I would love to be able to help them in some way but I am not sure how to do that you can't buy a cure for Cancer at the store. If you could I would put every dime of my allowance away for that and even work an extra job. So maybe you could just leave a note to let me know how I could help them as well, I would appreciate that.
11. A winning Lottery ticket. (I know that is a big one but, It could help with some of the things that pop up during the year when you aren't here.)
The rest I will talk directly to your boss about. We need to spend more time talking he/she and I. I know that Christmas is also His Sons birthday and there is quite a party so I think we should start talking more throughout the year when perhaps he isn't so busy. In fact that should be on my list as well.
Thank you Santa I know you will do your best.
It has been nice talking to you. Is there any special cookie I could leave out on the 25th? Let me know.
Thanks again,
Deb

Voodoo Camera Scavanger Hunt Begins

Hello All.....This is a slightly different sort of rant. This is more of a call to arms, a bell tolling for you to dust off your Camera phone/camera/web cam or even hammer and chisel, Anything you would use to capture a moment.
Over lunch at my favorite place a friend said she wanted to do a scavenger hunt. The image that came to mind was driving in my beat up old Datsun 210 looking for road signs or lawn art that would complete the list my friend Cheryl gave me. (Of course everything was returned) Do you know how hard it was to find a gnome. Really, they are everywhere when you don't want them but need one quick and you might have a problem. So in the effort to stay law abiding I think that we should just photograph what we need to find. We will be hunting for pictures and our prey is totally up to you. Now All the rules will be posted on the facebook group page that I set up for this but for those who are standing firm against facebook (and you know who you are) you can send me a email with web sized pics and I will put them on for you....Alley.....
The first set of 15 "prey" will be put up November 2nd and at that time you will be given a date to have them complete. The winner will be given the Drum roll please.......Golden Bragging Right as well as input on 5 of the next months scavenger clues. All photos (but one) each month must be taken fresh. Each month you are allowed one photo from your stockpiles. NO Cheating on this........(That really is directed at myself) Quality doesn't matter just content.
The only other request and again these rules will all be posted is that lets try and keep this a "clean" game. No nasty bits, if you know what I mean. Any truly offensive photos will be taken off and the poster will be banned from the group.

The link is http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=227103242616
On your mark.....Get set......GO!

Tissues and Lotion

Something so small can make such a big difference. Walking the aisle waiting for the pharmacist to call my name I recently pondered the inventions in my life that have made a big difference. Yes My Ipod is something I wouldn't want to do without how else could I listen to the complete and unabridged Harry Potter books 1 -7 non stop or stream the latest Dave Matthews concert (If I listen carefully I think I can hear my own screaming in the background....) But, none of them have made as much impact in the last 24 hours as a tissue with built in lotion. Perhaps for those of you with dirtier minds, tissues and lotion bring other thoughts. Not being a boy I don't appreciate their allure or the images they conjure. No, I have seen the advent of tissues that no longer leave my nose feeling like I have rubbed it repeatedly with sandpaper. For that I am grateful. I am also grateful for Antibiotics and steroids. For without the two this entry might have waited another week to be typed. So when the tissue maker who shall remain nameless but sounds like puffs plus came out with the whole lotion deal I thought why should I spend the extra money on a gimmick. Yet, standing there in the pharmacy aisle I would have done anything to help my youngest feel better and if a tissue claimed that it could keep his little nose from feeling broken and sore I would do what needed to be done. Thankfully that didn't require a moonlit raid on my neighbors stash or a trip to the hock shop after I paid for all of our prescriptions. My husband tells me it's the little things. So yes I do think he's right (you have it in writing now) These are the little things I am thankful for, friends who bring dinner and movies when we are sick, Small pills that fight infections in little lungs and tissues with lotion.

Mafia Wars aka Why I still play games

Not long ago....About 74 levels to be exact a friend asked me to join her facebook Mafia. I laughed and said sure why not. It seemed harmless and I liked The God Father what could it hurt. I wouldn't really be knocking over taxi stands or growing my Cuban Rum business by bullying and bribes. Little did I realize just how much fun being naughty was Not NAUGHTY just naughty I still wanted more than coal in my stocking this year for Christmas......(Although with the price of everything you can still burn coal and I bet it would be worth something on the black market) See...That is the kind of thinking that happens from spending too much time with your Mafia. I had this happen once before, I spent too much time playing Sim city. Trips with my husband would be spent looking at the towns we passed through and wondering where the water treatment plants were and how many power plants were needed to keep a city this size running. Times change though and now I wonder how many Casinos I can build on a three hour take or how do I get my hands on a guerrilla squad or the best bit of loot......(thank you Napoleon) How to get a liger. Yes the famed half tiger half lion.....Very powerful stuff..... I laugh every time I see one. All other games seem rather tame in comparison. Shoots and Ladders baby stuff, Pictionary? please. Some might suggest Monopoly.....not really, not unless you can go and beat up the guy that owns the land and hotels next to you take his money and collect the rents on the rest of his property. Now that is Mafia wars..... it isn't without risks, there is always someone bigger on the block who wants your money..but I can do jobs like Repel the Yakuza, Sell Guns to the Russian Mob, Obtain Compromising Photos, and Frame a Rival Capo. Not a bad hobby to do just before sorting dry laundry and doing dishes. So...here is the pitch, If you have a little free time and are feeling the need to cause a little mayhem and still keep your dreams clear and Santa happy I am always looking for more people to join my Mafia. I am generous with my gifts and always happy to beat up people who bother you. (I come with a shovel) Can you hear the music in the background mandolins playing the theme to the Godfather.... I can....I just got an energy boost and now it's time to go and take care of some jobs in Cuba....then Moscow. Think about it....It's an offer you can't refuse.

October

I have been waiting for the color to join us this fall because all the other signs of the season are here. There are of course the fun ones. Pumpkins and apples. School buses and warm sweatshirts. The disire to bake a chicken pot pie without hoping it doesn't heat up the kitchen too much. But what about the not so fun signs. The smell of dust as heat rises for the first time in months, Finding that a glove had shacked up with one of my long sleeved shirts....I am ashamed to say they gave birth to a single sock out of wedlock. I am hoping to find its orphan twin and reunite them soon. Tissues in the wash. Sniffles and cold breezes. Walking the track in shorts I realized I had overestimated my ability to keep warm through movement when the chilly fingers of fall gripped me round the knees. My favorite sure sign that fall is here is the cry of "Mom where is my....... underwear..... galoshes.... lunchbox.... ticket.... signed permission form..... seed collection..... lost tooth... eye glasses...... SOCKS.....wait I know where at least on of the socks are it was with the glove and the long sleeved shirt.

Pressure.....

Pressure....staunches the trickle of blood, turns grapes to juice, allows the skin to feel the touch of another, forces ink to transfer to paper. I had forgotten the thrill of tucking a plexi plate and wet paper under blankets to mingle and squeeze. (sounds mildly dirty and in a very real way it is) The baby it produces amazes me. I feel no limits to its alure and no restrictions to its possibilities. Ah.... if all pressure in life could be as satisfying.